Home Secretary Jacqui Smith has been caught with her trousers down after the cost of two pornographic films were discovered to have been claimed from her parliamentary expenses budget. Her husband, Richard Timney, has since admitted that it was he who had his trousers down. Mr Timney has issued what I would like to say is a groveling apology, but is rather less grovelly than one might have hoped. In fact, he seemed rather calm and unconcerned at the whole kerfuffle. It is not known at this time if he cracked one off before the press conference.

Jacqui Smith’s Husband Apologises for his Government-paid Porn

 

 

Smith, a confessed former cannabis junkie who has admitted flouting the laws of this land to indulge her previously personal preference for illegal drug-taking before changing her mind and choosing to meander smugly down the path of belligerent hypocrisy, claims to be “mortified” and “furious” – though this is hardly surprising considering what else she has been claiming recently. We excitedly await her claim to be David Beckham.

 

The sweetness and light that is Jacqui Smith has already been under investigation by the Parliamentary Commissioner for Standards over her £116,000 claim of second-home allowances for her family home in her Redditch constituency. She says that there is nothing wrong in claiming her main home is the spare room of her sister’s house in South London that she rents, keeping it in the family as she likes to do (the shining example of morality that is former druggie Jacqui Smith also uses her allowances to hire her husband as her parliamentary aide – on £40,000 a year).

 

Richard Timney, whose loyal wife we can only assume chose not to take her beloved’s name when they wed for reasons perhaps such as keeping hold of her unique and socially endangered maiden name of Smith, has said sorry for the mix-up and promised to repay the cost of each of the £5.00 blue movies.

 

Dick Timney has so far refused to comment on which particular porno films he was enjoying – as far as we know Debbie has never ‘done’ Redditch – but having witnessed his wife’s face on multiple occasions, this blogger doesn’t blame the poor chap for indulging in a bit of escapism. Though might we suggest an adventure holiday next time instead of Huge Cocks 4.  

Jacqui Smith reveals some details about the films
Jacqui Smith talks about the last film she saw

 

You’d have to think about it for £40,000 a year though, wouldn’t you? Well, he obviously thought so, unless he was high on Jacqui’s drugs when he proposed.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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